Listening or Hearing?

I struggle with this...

I just looked up the definitions on Dictionary.com becuz I find that I am constantly lecturing my boys about the difference between the two.  I'm not sure that I'm right so this is more of an opinion post.

My boys have excellent vocabularies and are experts in the fine art of manipulation of words.  We get into some deep, interesting conversations sometimes.  Many times deeper than they should be but that is one of the challenges of having two "deep readers".  See earlier posts...

So... here is just one dad's opinion.  I want listeners rather than just hearers and here is why?

Hearing means that an audible sound was picked up by the ear drum and recorded by the brain.  Something was heard like, "Jeff, the dishes need to be done."  Listening, however, means that something was heard and recorded by the brain AND that it was acted upon.  Carried out.  Followed through.  Completed.  Not forgotten.

Go back to my statement above.  The usual response is "Yeah, Dad" and then I would like to think that I was heard so it will get done.  My boys would like to think that because they responded in some way I will go away and they can go back to what they were doing and all is good.

I guess in writing this the difference is becoming more clear.  It's all in the response and the intent.  Listening will have a positive intent leading to a positive response while hearing doesn't.

Hmmmmm... I need to make sure I'm a good listener back to my kids and setting the right example.  There are times when my kids get on their run-on sentences or topics that I respond with a (hypothetical) "Yeah, Son" just so they stop or let me go back to what I was doing.

Guilty.